“He’s more
than a friend and more than a lover. He is my long lost sister.“
~RAIM
Hello there,
my dearest RANTers! I know that I have a debt to you guys but on this RANTday
I’ll be posting only one blog. And this would be dedicated to my dearest
friend. So please bear with me as the side comments would be lessen. I would
like to get a bit serious about this.
June 6, 2013
As I got
home from the gym, he contacted me through VIBER and asked me to do something
for him. Being sisters and all, I happily did it for him.
Then he sent
me a picture. A picture of him is depicting a very different kind of image.
Like he was sick and dying. I simply ignored his sent picture and just chatted
away our time.
Little did I
know that it would be my last picture of him.
June 10,
2013
It was at
6:00 a.m. that he called me through his phone asking me if I’ll be doing
something that day. Being the RANTday that it is, I told him that yes I will be
blogging. Then he asked me if I could buy him a silver necklace because his
last one was ruined. And I happily said yes.
As I was
doing my blog posts that day, he’s already nagging me if I’m already on my way
to their house at Pasig. I told him that
I could be there late in the afternoon as I was still doing my blog posts that
time and my lappie is getting crazy.
So as I was
on my way to their house, he was texting me and saying “Sis, I’m dying big time”.
I just took it as one of his jokes because he’s often like that. And that was
my mistake.
As soon as I
got into their house and went up to his room, he told me “You think I’m kidding
that I’m dying big time?”. Again, I simply smiled to him and gave him his
necklace. Little did I know that it would be the last time I would see him.
Then during
the next few days, I contacted his sister through Facebook to ask her the
condition of their brother.
June 14,
2013 (6:33 a.m.)
I didn’t
know why I got up so early that day. I just had the urge to look at my Facebook
messages. Then a message from his sister called my attention…
“Sir,
pakibalita po sa ibang friends niyo and kaofficemates niya na he’s already
gone. His wake will be dito sa house. Thank you po.”
Shocked.
That’s what I felt when I read that message. I didn’t cry at first but when I
sent a message to one of our friends, that’s when I broke down.
Why? Why
leave us now? We have plans together with Niño (a.k.a. Sanjie). You still have plans for yourself too.
What happened? I thought you were doing well like what you told me before?
Those were the thought that ran
through my head.
Feelings of loss and heartache
was what I had during those times. Even now as I am typing tis blog post on my
lappie, tears are running down my face. I can’t help it. The screen is getting
blurry. I can’t see what I’m typing. I’d better wipe these tears off first.
There you go.
I have got to pull myself
together. I even thought of that happening to my beloved husband and I just can’t
bear to think of it. Just losing a dear friend is enough to have a heartache but
to lose my most beloved? I just can’t bear to think of it.
I and he have secrets; secrets
in which I cannot reveal now but maybe in time. It is such a burden for me to
hold on to those secrets. They’re waiting to be blurted out but I can’t. I cannot
speak of such. Not now.
I would like to dedicate a poem
to him now but I can’t find any words to speak of it. I guess this is another “Blogger’s
Blackout” for me.
Let me just say these few words
for my dear friend; my sister who taught me how to be a bitch when I need to be
a bitch…
“Sis, wherever you are, you take
care of yourself there. Don’t be such a pussy. I know how you want things your
way but please be happy there for the time being while your soul is healing.”
uhhh TT.TT
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